First her hips don't lie... and now they don't know what they're doing!

So, I've been seeing Shakira perform lately on

lots of awards shows, talk shows, etc.

I still stand my ground that she was 

MUCH better as a 

Spanish language singer

than she is an English one.

(Suddenly, she started singing in English,

and her lyrics didn't quite make sense,

while her voice sounded a bit like she was 

gargling dirty bath water.)

Anyway.

I saw Shakira perform

"Hips Don't Lie"

on every awards show 

for at least 3 years straight.

I promise.

It's true.

And now, I'm not quite sure what she's singing, 

but every performance is exactly the same.

Doesn't she realize

the same people will be watching her?

But what I really want to talk about...

are her new dance moves.

See, Shakira's latest performances look like this:

Ummm. What was that?!

Correct me if I'm wrong, 

but after her transition from Spanish to English,

and the consequent dirty bath water, nonsense lyric singing....

weren't her bellydance moves the 

only thing she had going for her?!

Like I said before,

when Shakira likes something, 

she sticks with it.

So, I've seen this performance 

at least three or four times now.

(Seriously. VMA's. MTV Europe. Letterman. I could go on....)

But I've been trying to figure out 

where she came up with this crazy new dance style

that is frankly just AWFUL.

And here's the recipe I've come up with.

Shakira has taken a little bit of this....

(Go to 0:36 to see what I'm speaking of)

Threw in a dash of this...

(again... just a dash.)

Maybe a touch of this for seasoning....(Go to 0:25)

But what was the main ingredient?

Yes, there were dashes of this,

sprinkles of that,

pinches of whatnot...

But what was I missing?

And then it hit me.

I give you... the main ingredient.

Yep! That's it.

Glad I figured it out!

So... what do you think?

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